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Hello Darling,

As I play around with templates, I'm thinking of smoothing out my style to match my company's slick new look and classy feel. My focus is on executive online dating solutions, and while I'll always be a goofy irreverent girl at heart, I know clown noses 🤡 and Jokey Smurfettes don't always jibe with posh experiences. My #fea6d1 pink, however, will remain.

Scammer or Sexworker on Ashley Madison?

In an email exchange with a client today, he talks about encountering a scammer posing as a Dom on Ashley Madison. He listed a number of red flags that alerted him to the scam. As I read, I wasn't so sure she was a scam. It’s more likely she was a sex worker looking for clients on AM.

So my client was right in a sense, she wasn't a regular girl, but she probably wasn't a scammer. Follow as I walk you thorough why I don't think she was a scammer.

Red Flag #1 — Sales Pitch. She made her sales pitch by offering Dom services for a fee early on. Sure, it’s awkward, but think about what she’s offering. Scammers usually don’t offer something upfront but suck you in and then play on your heartstrings once they think it’s the right time to strike. A sex worker doesn’t have time to lure people in, so it makes sense they’d talk about money first.

What was probably happening. Think about it, she’s never going to convince someone not looking for domination into being dominated, so it’s best to get it out of the way up front so she can move on. She has clients out there.

Red Flag #2 — No pictures. He became concerned that she was offering to dominate him without exchanging pictures. Only a scammer would do that because who would have sex with someone without knowing what they looked like?

What was probably happening. Sex workers are business people. They provide a service and so are not interested in what their clients look like. Would she date an ugly client? Probably not, but that doesn’t mean she wouldn’t suck an ugly guy off. Because love is love, and business is business.

Men looking for domination are looking for domination and are less concerned about what she looks like. The arousal comes from the experience and not her looks. Sure, we’d all love to be dominated by some sexy vixen, but you aren’t there for that. Not knowing can heighten the sexual experience.

Red Flag #3 — No meeting before the sexual activity. She didn’t want to have a coffee with him. He was new to AM and the game and expected that would be the natural progression.

What was probably happening. People in BDSM space wouldn’t expect to meet their professional Dom outside their business place. Would you ask to meet a wedding planner for a coffee to ensure she’s a wedding planner? No.

Red Flag #4 — She had an in-home dungeon.

What was probably happening. There are dungeons where you can rent out spaces, but I’m not surprised someone would have one at home. Think of the tax write-offs and low overhead. It’s the ultimate WFH situation.

For the client worried about getting robbed, consider that you are invited to her home. That house isn’t going anywhere, so short of being murdered, you’ll know where you were when you were robbed — and she lives there.

Also, how long would the “rob/murder my client” last before someone called the police? Not everyone into BDSM has something to hide. They also know sex work is illegal, so they can perfectly ruin the Dom’s business. Who wants to be charged with running a bawdy house? If she has kids, do you think she’s going to risk the social service involvement that could come with robbing clients?

More practically, you can probably only rob a client once, whether they report you or not. Conversely, you can lighten a client’s wallet often over if you provide great service. Which makes more sense?

A client is probably safest in her home. She isn’t, but him? 100%.

My clients are worried about scammers. I get it. Meeting people online could lead to bad outcomes. Meeting people in real life can lead to bad outcomes. More often than not, tho, the outcomes aren’t bad. They are either neutral or good. Being aware of possible scam situations is healthy. Seeing scams everywhere until proven otherwise probably means that you’ve picked the wrong hobby. I won’t say that bad things don’t happen, but that doesn’t mean everything is a scam, yet it persists.

Takeaway - Is the world a scam? Case in point - Maddierose’s sister, asked if I was scamming them. Maddie pointed out that I'd bought them a computer and had already paid them $1000. She tells me she also dryly observed, “if she’s scamming us, she’s not doing a very good job.”

When evaluating something for its scammy qualities, consider all the facts, and not just the ones that appeal to your already formed beliefs and emotions.

Ashley Madison's annual 8% subscription bump

As I focus on marketing my agency, I came across this stat. AM annually sees this spike in December and January. I've mentioned that before and written about the post-Christmas slump people experience that causes them to go looking. I'm working on getting ready for this; maybe you should too.

To get ready for that, I'm offering my Black Friday deals all this week. So what's today's special? How about 10% off my $500 Tier 1 support package?

So what do you think of this template? Let me know, because I think I'm going to stick with it!

Thank you for everything you do!

Teresa

Your Faery Godmother of Adultery 🧚🏻‍♀️

As always, please let me know if you have questions or story ideas! I couldn't do this without you!

113 Cherry St #92768, Seattle, WA 98104-2205
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